Chris is playing a rousing round of COD4 on the Xbox, so I’m amusing myself in the kitchen, per usual, trying not to be stressed out by the sounds of an imminent nuclear war on the television that sits only 20 feet from my kitchen and is roughly the size of my kitchen table. Surround sound has been installed to ensure that as Chris dies on a particularly grueling battle, over and over and over, I get to hear the same sounds of the commander telling him not to “kill the friendlies.” It’s superb.

I’ve pulled out my big, blue Cordon Bleu book, and located a recipe that uses Pate a choux (puff pastry). I’ve never made a puff pastry before, but I certainly enjoy eating them. The batter came together pretty easily, but who the hell knows if it’s right. It was “glossy” and formed a “smooth paste.” The book had some ominous warnings about weighing your eggs to make sure you don’t get too much liquid in your batter, but then didn’t tell me how much the eggs should actually weigh, making the warning useless and kind of alarming. Anyway, the goucheres have some really badass cheddar in them from the Central Market in our area, and I can’t seem to stop eating the leftover shreds. I think my body is craving salt, since I ate almost nothing but frosting yesterday in my bid to make a chocolate cinnabon cake.

An aside: the chocolate cinnabon cake is sitting on my counter, covered in fondant, topped with a very realistic cinnamon roll made of fondant. I want to eat it, but can’t justify cutting a cake without having guests over. Sadly, we’re new to Texas and I don’t really know many people to force cake upon, so I’m waiting to hear back on one of the only possibles. Isn’t it funny h0w moving can make the best of us feel like big, wanking losers?

Anyway, the calories consumed yesterday were totally unjustified, as they were mostly royal icing and fondant, and I don’t even really LIKE fondant, but it quells my sweet tooth, so I eat it anyway. I probably ate play-dough as a kid… So today is savory food day, and I need to go exercise off my frosting binge but lack motivation. Aren’t Saturdays supposed to be lazy?

The end result: Puff pastry, two ways. One is a sharp cheddar “cheesy poof” pastry, the other a dark chocolate cherry essence eclair. Awesome.

What am I doing?

I love to blog, but have been patchy at best in keeping up with them. Why? Because my blogs have been only about things that anger me, and while those bouts of irritation with the general populous are frequent and all-consuming, I find that frequently I am blogging about the same topic. Usually that topic is obesity. So what do I do differently every day that I can blog about? What am I passionate about? The answers are:

1) Cooking foods I know
2) Experimenting with foods I don’t know
3) Feeding other people
4) Feeding myself
5) Doing all of the above without getting fat

The final prong of my “passion list” involves a lot of work at the gym, a lot of obsessing, and a lot of attempts to find a balance, but it’s worth it because, as I previously mentioned, obesity irritates me.

I start culinary school at the Culinary Institute of America in 2 months. I am in charge of making my own wedding cake in 11 months. I don’t know how to make a wedding cake, and I’ve never done culinary school. So this blog will be about me, my passion for food, my desire to stay thin, and my attempt to balance all of the above while training to be a chef and making my wedding a success.

Hopefully, this will help me not to become crazy in my attempt. At the very least, this can serve as a food diary for me so I can keep track of what I’m putting in my mouth, how I made it, and why it’s awesome.

So welcome to my journey!