Mopey Mopers

Willie and Maddie have been kind of lackluster the last couple of weeks, too

Most of my meals as of late are stolen. I guess not, in the most technical sense of the word, since I both a)paid 26k for my education and b)am only taking food that would be thrown away or fed to the PM students. But the basic idea is that I haven’t really bought any groceries in a while, instead preferring to take whatever is leftover at school. I’ve used it both at home, and to feed the doctors. It’s not like it’s swill, either. I mean, I’m talking full, uncut loaves of bread still warm from the oven. I’m talking 4 freshly griddled reuben sandwiches. I’m talking an entire pot of duck and pork rilette that hasn’t even been pierced. It’s good, fresh, expensive stuff. It just happens that we overproduce at school.

Saving the money on groceries has been great. We just bought the new Canon Vixia HV30, which is a high-def “prosumer” camcorder. It’ll come in handy for the wedding, and for my eventual home porn business, which will never happen, but is a good excuse for buying things. “I really can’t afford this shirt…oh well. I’ll just put it on the credit card and go home and sell some amateur porn.” Right. I don’t even like to be photographed in my clothes, let alone have HIGH DEFINITION action footage of my thigh-meat jiggling around in the manner of barely-set custard.

The other thing is that I have little food motivation lately. I’m in baking and pastry, which is AWESOME, except for that I have gained a pound or two, and my wedding is in LESS THAN THREE WEEKS. Yes, I’m yelling a lot. But seriously. Less than three weeks. And I’m gaining weight. Suck. I’m not terribly worried, though. I’m sure it will be fine given that I haven’t tried on my wedding dress since November.

But it’s also very distracting. It’s such a big thing, you know? And I’m in this strange-ass city with no friends or family, and I’m homesick and bitter and nervous and lonely. Chris is great, but I feel like I should be surrounded by festivity right now, and instead I’m not. Plus, I get the feeling I’ve started alienating the people I DO know down here by talking about how much I hate Texas. And that makes me feel like complete dog shit. I didn’t realize how much I’d been doing it until it was pointed out to me. Ugh.

So I’m a little down. But excited, you know, for May 9th. The one fantastic constant between Colorado and Texas has been Chris, and he’s amazing. And he’s been trying to participate in ritualistic bride stuff as much as he’s able.

Chris modeling a pre-nuptual Origins clarifying masque

We did find a farmer’s market on Saturday, though, which was uplifting. I love farmer’s market, and those of you who have been reading this for some time may remember my trials trying to find a decent farmer’s market out here last summer. This one was, ironically, in the parking lot of my school. I bought some fantastic carrots, onions, fennel, broccoli, and grass-fed short ribs from a humane cattle farm. I’ve entirely stopped buying meat that isn’t certified (or verifiably) humane. It makes me feel better about the whole food chain thing. So we had a great stir fry with the broccoli and some carrots on Saturday, and then braised the short ribs in pinot noir, beef stock and garlic, shredded it, and put it on some polenta with a drizzle of the red wine reduced, and some of the fresh carrots, still pretty crisp. I hate soft carrots. The carrots were ridiculously sweet and delicious. They still had that snap and juice to them that comes only from carrots that were pulled out of the ground in the last 48 hours, and they tasted like honey.

And a week ago our grocery store had prime rib on sale for 8.99/#, so I bought a big bone-in standing rib roast and cooked it up. I made mashed potatoes with butter, truffles, and fresh peas, and a basic jus.
Fantastic, fattening, and utterly decadent food. Small portions for poor me, obviously, but it was still like a big hug from a hunk of meat. I took the leftovers from the prime rib to school and shaved them very thinly with our slicer, brought them home, and served them on some cottage cheese and dill rolls that were made at school that day. It was a fantastic matchup, with the soft and buttery roll surrounding the very rare shaved prime rib. And the fact that the rolls, before being baked, were being referred to as “the cottage cheese dill dough,” didn’t hurt my spirits. Heh.

Other than that? I’ve eaten a lot of puff pastry. And pate a choux. And pastry cream. And guilt. And I can’t wait to go home and see everyone and turn into a wife and get to stop wearing attractive underwear. Kidding.

10 thoughts on “Mopey Mopers”

  1. no, you’re not kidding. Trust me, you’ll get about 3 years in and be like “why the fuck do I need to put that thong on?”

    would you like me to come down and commiserate about living in texas? though of course I think the bigger problem is that you’re in SA instead of austin.

  2. Also, I don’t know if this will make you sadder or not, but my ex-intern just wrote a whole thing about when he says he likes texas, he really just means austin. And this is a guy who was born and raised in texas. Check it out–half broke hotel from my blog.

  3. if i lived in san antonio i would most likely really hate it too. but instead i live in nashville – for 15 years. and the reason it works for me is because everyone i know is not from here – well almost. and the music community is tight and i used to work in the biz – so anyway, most of my friends are songwriters who are freakin brilliant. plus i go to nyc 3x a year and a few other places thrown in for good measure. and then i come home to a pretty damn fine life that i cultivated carefully…

    when i was your age i lived in australia for 4 years and hawaii for one and i hated it and all i talked about were the states and nyc – and well, people got sick of my ass. probably wanted to tell me to just go the fuck home.

    anyway – enough about me.

    and hey, you’re getting married soon! princess for a day. are you going on a honeymoon? if so i missed the details.

  4. Go ahead and diss Texas; they seem ready to secede the minute their asshole preznit isn’t ruining the world any more.

    But you might want to pack your thongs and move away before they actually do secede, since my guess is that they’ll be pretty diligent about the borders once they become their own country.

  5. No underware is much easier, then you can never be accused of granny panties.

    And where you live does suck so don’t feel bad. I did the same thing when we were in California and everyone was annoyed that I thought their great state was a piece of shit. You’ll be out of there soon enough and it will just be a bad memory. It makes you appreciate the places that are great.

    What day are you guys flying into Colorado?

  6. I’m not going to talk about Texas like everyone else. So there.

    You’re not stealing – you’re being a good environmentalist! When I was in college I used to dumpster-dive meals from the French bakery and the pizza joint. It was all bagged and clean, just day-old. Such a waste, and would just end up in landfills, making methane. What you’re doing is good for the planet!

  7. Girl, I hope you don’t feel lonely, when there are people from all over that great U.S. of yours that faithfully tune in to see what you’re up to and support you. Oh yeah, and people from Canada, like me. And I’m in FRANCE right now, and with the precious bit of Wifi that we FINALLY found I’m checking *your* site.

    I know that it’s hard when your nearest and dearest aren’t…well, NEAR, but sometimes just knowing how much people care can be enough. My 5 closest friends live between 4.5 hours and 3 days drive away, and yet I do NOTHING without their consultation. And when I celebrate, they celebrate, even from across the country. Because, really, that’s love.

    And hey, don’t take it too hard if not all the Texans share your point of view. Plenty of them must. When people criticize what a shit-show Toronto is, I usually just snicker and agree…but that’ MY city, that I adore, despite everything.

    And I drank a bottle of Beaujolais tonight, then Mike fell asleep and I’m well through the second, so I should probably stop now.

    But three weeks! That’s AMAZING!!! Woot to you!!!

  8. Heh heh, meat hug.

    Stay away from the puff pastry. That’ll be the end of you.

    And by the way, we should all be so lucky to have free gourmet food at our fingertips. My culinary school would have cut off a hand for taking home leftovers. Cheap bastards.

  9. psst: I had to go to speech therapy when I was a child, because I couldn’t pronounce ‘r’ properly. ‘Drawer’ was my nemesis. And my word verif was ‘rororin’, which (because I’m hammered…mostly) I had to type three times before I got it right. I think the internet is taunting me. Just sayin’.

  10. I am from Texas and I do not like it. I want to be in Colorado. I miss it like crazy every day. I used to go there once a year AT LEAST from the time that we moved when I was in 2nd grade until I moved to this stink hole in Atlanta, Georgia. I don’t like either of these places. And my boyfriend doesn’t like the cold. Stupid man. I will woo him to my point of view. That’s what I do.

    I gotta tell you i almost shot fruit juice out my nose at this comment “the cottage cheese dill dough” as it was tooooo hilarious. I would not have been able to eat it without snickering.

    YAY for the upcoming wedding. And double YAY for a truly awesome farmer’s market!!!!

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