Sometimes things aren’t what they seem. For instance, this picture of my breakfast sucks. I took it lazily and without an eye for detail because I was hungry. But it didn’t taste sucky, it just looked sucky. It tasted delicious. Because it was Grand Marnier challah french toast on a puddle of creamsicle creme anglaise and topped with a tart orange glaze. I decorated it with tangelo supremes. And it tasted great in the way that only a decadent, delicious, sweet and sassy breakfast can. That’s why people love breakfast, you know. Because it’s a meal where you can have dessert and bacon in the same meal, on the same plate, without it being avant garde.
Pretty much everyone loves breakfast. Everyone except my brother, that is. My brother, Erik, HATES breakfast. He says it’s a culmination of foods that suck. He clearly doesn’t know any better. He loves bacon. He loves cake. He loves french fries. He loves butter. He loves to eat the centers out of loaves of french bread like a little tunnel-rat. So I don’t know what breakfast he’s really rebelling against. I have plans to fix this, specifically on Monday, May 18th at 10 AM. I’m going to make a welcome-back-breakfast-spread that will knock all of our respective socks off. I’m going to make him a waffle to end all waffles, and a spread of supporting (but glamorous) characters to really reel him in. He’s going to love it. Oh no. I’m a little drunk.
the point of all this is that I adore my brother to tiny little pieces. He’s a marine officer of sorts, graduating at the top of his rank, but is also really good at chugging beers and calling you out on grammar and spelling. You’ll love him. When? You may ask? Well, you’ll be given plenty of time to love him as he’s my guest blogger for the week I’m gone for the wedding. He’ll be watching the puppy and cats, hanging out, and eating premade food from the carefully labeled freezer and pantry section, and basicaly just keeping everything running well until we get back. And he’s bringing his recently betrothed with him to make sure he doesn’t set things on fire.
He’s startlingly intelligent and funny, and he likes to eat. You’ll love him.
His Name is Erik, and he’ll be around beginning in the next few days. Try to comment back to him a lot. He’ll like that. And when I get home…breakfast is ON.